Why doesn't she just ask.

Bangs

I have asked and asked and asked "Do you want you bangs cut?" "No, I want them long." "okay...*sigh*."

But yesterday SHE DID IT AGAIN! Yes, that's right, my daughter has cut her hair a third time. I have grown as a person since the last time, it probably helped that she didn't do as much damage as last time. Under her bangs is a tiny really short spot and above that is a slight divot in her bangs. Honestly, I have, accidentally, cut such things in her bangs before (in my defense, she is wiggly!). From now until Bronte grows out of such things (or she moves out), she gets bangs.

As punishment, she spent all day in her room. She cried because I wouldn't talk to her outside of what was necessary. She wasn't allowed to talk. This seems to be more punishment than ANYTHING else we have tried. I have tried (or forced my husband to try) almost ALL suggestions. Spanking doesn't work on her. Standing with her nose on the wall, taking away stuff she loves, someone to talk to, etc, works best for her.

Not all kids are the same, so all punishment shouldn't be either. She is a lot like me so I always try to remember what worked for me. My mother informed me that when anybody spanked me (my dad used a belt buckle on me at least once), I laughed out loud. Spanking didn't work. My Dad refused to try what did work and it spiraled into what I think of as abuse. It should never turn into that. I do not think spanking in itself is abusive, but shouldn't the punishment fit the crime AND be an effective behavioral changing tool? If spanking doesn't work it shouldn't be used. It shouldn't be used by anybody who doubts their ability to keep the punishment calm and controlled, not an expression of deep anger and frustration.

Just my 2 cents.

GOD bless,
Tiff